When real people go on vacation, the worst thing that might happen involves someone forgetting a toothbrush at the hotel. When people in movies go on vacation, all hell breaks loose. Just take a look at Hostel, Turistas, and now A Perfect Getaway. It's a wonder folks even leave the house after seeing what shenanigans befall those taking a holiday on the big screen. To be fair, A Perfect Getaway bills itself as a more slick and less stomach-churning alternative to the icky escapades of Eli Roth. On the other hand, it's not as suspenseful as I would like, for this film contains few moments of true tension and an abundance of flat-out putzing around.

Our story is set amidst the lush, gob-smacking landscapes of Hawaii. In this island paradise, newlyweds Cliff (Steve Zahn) and Cydney (Milla Jovovich) are spending their honeymoon, though they'll soon wish they asked William Shatner for a better vacation deal. After crossing paths with two couples, word breaks out about a gruesome murder scene elsewhere in the state. When they hear that the suspects might have hopped to their island, Cliff and Cydney begin to wonder if their newfound companions might by the culprits. Could it be the Iraq vet (Timothy Olyphant) with all those tall tales to tell, or is it the high-strung hippie (Chris Hemsworth) with a grudge against Cliff? Suspicious eyes are cast all about, though the answer remains a mystery -- until the killers among these travelers decide to strike again.

A Perfect Getaway comes courtesy of David Twohy, a man who's spent the last decade or so working chiefly in science fiction. After his insanely busy opus The Chronicles of Riddick, I'm glad to see Twohy taking on something less heavy and more on the breezy side. This is a no-frills thriller, one that offers little beyond just the thrill of the mystery. With bombastic movies like Orphan on the market, Twohy's film might not seem like much, but I prefer it this way. Like the works of Agatha Christie, A Perfect Getaway uses simplicity to its advantage. You can enjoy it with a certain amount of comfort, knowing that no one's intelligence will be offended. However, while this approach works to an extent, the suspense is all too often diffused as a result. The story rarely ever keeps you on edge, so save for the  few times an intriguing development arises, it feels like you're watching the cast's home movies.

It's too bad A Perfect Getaway unfurls the one ace up its sleeve, in the form of the obligatory twist, much too early. Once it's on the table, there's nothing to do except turn the last 20 minutes into a middling chase movie. Also curious is how Twohy saves the visual trickery for these climactic scenes, when it certainly could have livened up the first two acts. The man still allows you to soak up the scenery in a big way, using many shots of sweeping vistas, and you're almost surprised when things take a turn for the deadly (keyword: almost).

Though the characters are a bit one-note at times, the cast members deliver capable enough performances. Zahn in particular sheds some of his goofball tendencies, and Jovovich finally gets a breather from blasting away ghouls in a less physically-demanding role.

A Perfect Getaway is certainly more downplayed than this summer's assortment of glorified fireworks shows. It's not as crass or pandering a picture, though it tends to drag when it should be ramping up the tension. A Perfect Getaway may not be as idyllic as the title would like you to think, but there are worse ways to spend an escape to the movies.

MY RATING: ** (out of ****)

(Released by Rogue Pictures and rated "R" for graphic violence, language including sexual references, and some drug use.)