I hate to think RocknRolla is Guy Ritchie's way of telling fans he's a two-trick pony. With their quirky characters and visual trickery, his Snatch and Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels easily rank among the finest modern crime pictures. But you wouldn't be able to tell it from the looks of RocknRolla, which knows the words that go along with the gangster genre but lacks the all-important music. This film feels like it's aping Ritchie's style rather than embracing it. A confounding conundrum of a caper, the movie gives up trying to make sense around the same time viewers stop caring.

The catalyst for all the action taking place here is Lenny Cole (Tom Wilkinson), an old-school London gangster who specializes in crooked land deals. After a piece of property in the city's increasingly hot market comes his way, Lenny orchestrates his usual symphony of dirty dealings. But slinky accountant Stella (Thandie Newton) throws a monkey wrench in his business with a shady Russian (Karel Roden) after hiring two good-natured thugs (Gerard Butler and Idris Elba) to make off with the latter's cash. Then there's the matter of the Russian's "lucky" painting, given to Lenny as security but swiftly stolen by Johnny Quid (Toby Kebbell), a junkie rocker who has no intentions of letting it go.

There's a lot more to RocknRolla's labyrinthine story, but I'll just say Ritchie makes sure the screen is occupied at all times -- the man's trouble lies in getting audiences to care. The bottom line? There's no rhyme or reason to RocknRolla -- only the illusion of stuff happening and the absence of something to connect it all together. The story comes across as a concoction of various hard-boiled gangster elements blended only halfway through. You can see what Ritchie was trying to get at, but you're still left with a bitter-tasting cocktail. Focus seems Ritchie's biggest problem here, as he never sticks around one subplot long enough for viewers to get their bearings. We're always left in a state of wondering who's stealing from whom and why, and not in a good way. The dearth of a point gets  downright aggravating, especially when the film goes about its business as if everything makes perfect sense. RocknRolla needs a more carefree attitude, which shows itself scantly throughout the production.

This being a Guy Ritchie feature, you'd think there would be some style to fall back on and to distract viewers from the story's bewildering nature. Unfortunately, style is a rare commodity in RocknRolla. Aside from the engaging opening credits and a robbery sequence that goes hilariously awry, Ritchie plays things with a straight face. The entire film appears bathed in a brown, almost washed-out color scheme, which would fit the film perfectly if it ever got around to utilizing it. Instead, the characters  talk circles around each other as if they were part of a high school production of The Sting. That's a shame, since they do their darndest to make RocknRolla seem more fun to be in  than to watch. Butler fares well as the closest thing to a hero, Wilkinson lives it up as a perpetually grizzled mobster, and Newton fills the femme fatale role just fine. I also rather liked Body of Lies actor Mark Strong's turn as Archie, Lenny's right hand man, our narrator, and the only character who has the slightest idea of what's going on.

Earlier this year, I blasted another recent Ritchie release, Revolver, for copping a pretentious attitude and presenting a story impossible to understand. RocknRolla may be free from that film's uppity mindset, but its premise is just as impenetrable. 

MY RATING: * 1/2 (out of ****)

(Released by Warner Bros. Pictures and rated "R" for pervasive language, violence, drug use and brief sexuality.)