There's no fool like an old fool, as they say, or one that's hunting treasure. Fool's Gold serves up  both. Although this movie turned out slightly better than I expected after seeing the trailer, that’s not saying much.

Everything appears pretty and touristy on the coast of the Caribbean, where the movie begins. Tess (Kate Hudson) is in front of a judge getting a divorce. Her soon-to-be ex, Finn Finnegan (Matthew McConaughey), can't make it to the hearing because he just blew up their treasure-diving boat and is being chased by the thugs he owes money to. He finally runs into the courtroom looking like a dead rat, but it’s too late. He's single again, and his explanation about knowing at last where the treasure they've been looking for is buried, falls on Tess's deaf ears.

When Tess finds out about the boat, she couldn't be happier because she's now rid of Finn. So she's off to her job as a steward on board the well-off Nigel Honeycutt's (Donald Sutherland) luxurious yacht.

Before you can say “this movie is all wet,” Finn schemes to help Nigel's young daughter who arrives on the yacht by helicopter. When he almost gets killed by the girl’s driver, he's brought onboard the yacht, and it's one big happy reunion for everyone. After a long and tedious explanation about the treasure, Tess and Finn actually convince Nigel to join them, at his expense of course, on their hunt.

The rest of the movie is filled with lots of underwater swimming, more gangsters (Ray Winstone,  Malcolm Jamal Warner, Kevin Hart) running around beating up on each other, and useless banter between Tess and Finn. Nigel's daughter Gemma (Alexis Dziena) has the IQ of a snail, which makes the perfect counterpart to Finn's equally clueless friend Alfonz (Ewen Bremner).

Fool's Gold is like The Three Stooges meets Gilligan's Island. Throughout the movie, its characters shoot each other, hit people over the head with shovels or baseball bats, and put knives to throats. Boats and planes burn up, blow up and crash. But no one gets seriously hurt; they're like punching bags that get knocked over and swing right back up again.

With the intellect of all of these characters combined, they still couldn't find their way out of a bottle much less discover where a 300-year-old sunken Spanish treasure might be. What little bit of sexual chemistry McConaughey and Hudson had when they appeared together in How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days seems non-existent in this movie, and so are any acting skills. Where's the Kate Hudson who was such a standout in Almost Famous? Where's the McConaughey who excelled in We Are Marshall?

Although I laughed a few times during this film, mainly to keep myself awake, there's very little that’s funny about these cardboard characters. Screenwriters John Claflin and Daniel Zelman (Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid) and director Andy Tennant (Hitch), who also worked on the screenplay, must have a needed a vacation to a tropical locale, for that's all you get out of Fool's Gold -- pretty scenery.

(Released by Warner Bros. and rated “PG-13” for profanity, sexual situations, mild violence.)

Review also posted at www.reviewexpress.com.